Monday, July 11, 2016

FILM -- Condemned


You might want to think twice about squatting in a condemned building in Manhattan. You might end up turning into a demon!

The film opens with poor rich girl Maya who lives in a beautiful house right on the beach but yet she’s crying he eyeball out. Why? Oh, because she’s fed up with her parents fighting. Forget about the beautiful view or the soothing sounds of the ocean waves. Maya is on the phone with her musician boyfriend Dante and the two decide it would be a great idea for them to move in together. Dante lives on the Lower East side of Manhattan with two other people but that’s the least of her troubles! Dante and his pals are squatting in a condemned building with meth heads, a transgender prostitute, muscled Neo-Nazi couple, a drug dealer who wants to be a star, an orthodox abusive Jewish man, and a man in a diaper as neighbors! Instead of Maya running back to her fancy mansion she falls in love with the urine infested hallways and graffiti everywhere.


Of course the beauty of this condemned building doesn’t last long because through the drains we see one of the tenants who whips up his own drugs and dumps them down the drain, causing a rabid virus. What makes the situation even worse is that he locks everyone inside! Once this virus infects the tenants, each one begins morphing into a pus oozing, vomiting demon who violently attacks others. From then on out it’s a battle for the tenants to get out of the quarantined apartment alive and unaffected.

Director and writer Eli Morgan Gesner who is also the co-founder of Zoo York, infuses unique pieces throughout the film. One of the effects of this demon virus is the violent hallucinations and they are awesome and definitely entertaining to watch. As far as it goes with the acting, I have one major complaint and that’s Dylan Penn who plays Maya. She’s gorgeous on camera, however she isn’t a great actress, in fact she’s awful. Everyone else did an amazing job, one of my favorite characters is Tess (Lydia Hearst) a meth head who used to be a model. She has a boyfriend who is a meth head as well but she still has all her haute couture clothing in the condemned apartment.



Condemned is far from perfect, one of the major things that I couldn’t get past is that there are over six people coming in and out of a condemned building and no one on the outside seems to notice. Weird! Overall, Condemned is a cheesy horror film that’s far from scary, however it’s amusing. While watching it, I couldn’t help but feel that Condemned felt like a Troma film. It is filled with gore, silly splatter and the battle of survival. But I do recommend it to people who are into cheesy horror films.

2½ out 5 queen skulls!

Post a Comment